The Missing Piece
Recently I was working with a teenager who was struggling to get to school.
School felt slow. Boring. Pointless.
As we explored what was happening, we talked about expectations, relationships, energy levels and a few of the other things contributing to how they were feeling. But I couldn't shake the sense that something was missing.
Their why.
Not What do you want to be when you grow up?
Not What university course do you want to do?
Something much closer.
Why does getting up and going to school matter to you?
It wasn't a question they'd really considered before.
Like many young people, they'd spent plenty of time talking about careers and future pathways. But those ideas felt distant. They weren't enough to make a cold Monday morning feel worthwhile.
So I shared a story.
Imagine a group of Olympic athletes standing on the start line.
They're all chasing the same outcome: to win the race.
But each of them is driven by something different.
One wants to become the best in the world.
One wants to prove to their dad that they can do it.
One dreams of seeing a gold medal hanging in their home.
Another wants their name in the record books.
One longs to be recognised.
Another simply wants to discover what they're capable of.
The finish line is the same. The reason for running is different.
And that reason shapes everything.
Every training session.
Every early morning.
Every meal.
Every sacrifice.
None of those moments are the goal. They're stepping stones.
As we explored this idea together, something shifted.
Instead of asking, "How do I make myself go to school?" we began asking, "What could school become a stepping stone towards?"
That opened up an entirely different conversation.
They didn't leave with a perfectly formed answer.
They didn't suddenly love school.
But they did leave with something more valuable than a quick solution.
They left with a question worth exploring.
Sometimes motivation isn't something we find.
Sometimes it's something we uncover, one stepping stone at a time.